Here’s a fun one for you. As a content writer for Trademark Productions as well as a writer outside of work, it sometimes falls upon me to meet, chat with and otherwise interact with potential clients when they’re having a website built or rebuilt. One good thing is that most everybody has a website these days, so I’m simply dealing with updating and revising existing content. Those rare gems walk through door from time to time, though, who look like everybody else, appear to function like everybody else and then start to talk. And what they say can drive a content writer to the brink of insanity.

True or False?

TRUE. One client who I won’t name came in a few months ago and after I was introduced, calmly told me “I want you to write about the business, but not say anything about the business.” I believe my eyebrow automatically rose in a Spock-like arch, only he kept speaking before I could express the first of many thoughts of dismay. “I also want you to write about me, but I don’t want you to say anything about me.”

My lip quivered, my eyes narrowed and some very colorful metaphors interspersed within questions started to escape. That’s when Dwight—who was sitting next to me—muttered “DON’T say it!” I wanted to say it. I pretty much did say it, only after the client left.

Write about the company and the owner, but don’t say anything about either? Really? It made sense to the client and it was expected that I should have found it to make an equal amount of sense, only it really didn’t. Developers are used to working with things that make sense and when they don’t, it’s because there’s a very logical reason. Writers are used to working with somewhat illogical things that make very logical sense by the time we’re done with. Completely illogical things rarely make sense.

So, please, if you’re a potential client, come prepared to speak about your content in terms that actually make sense. Content writers aren’t mind readers. We just want you to think we are because we produce brilliant results! At least we think they’re brilliant.

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