Dear Google,

Something about you has been bothering me for awhile now and I don’t know if this relationship is working out for me anymore.  I’m not talking about our relationship, because I do in fact love you.  But you have some quirks that I need you to work on.

I’m talking about the relationship that you have going on with Royal Oak, a city that I have grown to love over the last decade of my life.  It seems that you have been cheating on Royal Oak for quite some time now.  You’re even calling Royal Oak the other municipality’s name from time to time which further strains your relationship.

So that there are no more embarrassing situations for you in 2012, I wanted to be a friend and give you some advice.

I live and work in a city called Royal Oak, Michigan.  I take my family to places in this city and I recommend to others that they hang out here.  It’s a great little town full of restaurants, boutiques, bars and culture.  The city is also full of tech start-ups, small mom & pop businesses and a very diverse middle to upper middle class population.

To the south of us, in a much different part of metro Detroit, is a small township called Royal Oak Charter Township.  Between Royal Oak (city) and Royal Oak Charter Township, are several other small cities. I’ve used my favorite map service to show you the difference in the location of their city/township halls.

[iframe width=”100%” height=”350″ src=”,+Ferndale,+MI+48220-4200+(Royal+Oak+Township+Hall)&daddr=211+S+Williams+St,+Royal+Oak,+MI+48067-2619+(Royal+Oak+City+Hall)&hl=en&sll=42.474446,-83.138655&sspn=0.082425,0.181789&geocode=FXa8hwIdrhcL-yG88spAR0Js2A%3BFaZUiAIdyFcL-ynN1r_oac8kiDGUlKWSPhFJ1A&vpsrc=0&mra=pd&t=m&z=13″]

The Royal Oak Charter Township, while I’m sure its a very lovely place, has an entirely different vibe, culture and population. You see, it’s not just geography and distance that separates us.

So, what I’m trying to figure out, Google, is this: in all of your vast experience, knowledge and greatness, why is it that every time I try to check-in with G+ to somewhere in Royal Oak (city) and often when I try to give directions to someone … you say Royal Oak Charter Township?

My home, agency and life are not located between 8 Mile and 9 Mile. I assume that people in Royal Oak Charter Township are equally confused as theirs is not located between 10 Mile and 14 Mile.

Your issues seem to only be in a couple of services still.  Google Maps seems to have gotten better, but still has the occasional glitch.  G+ is definitely broken.

Look, Google.  I know that you have a lot of relationships and data to figure out, but this can’t continue.  The people of Royal Oak and Royal Oak Charter Township deserve better from you.  You don’t want to be known for screaming out the wrong name, do you? This cheating has to stop.  Let’s see if you can get your relationship issues fixed soon.

Love and Best Wishes from a faithful follower and minion,


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